I know people warned me, but they were definitely right. This journey has been one of the most challenging, trying times in my life but certainly THE MOST rewarding, satisfying and exciting times. There are times when I promise if there was another hour in the day I might go crazy. Then the sun sets, we head to bed and I just pass out. This is tiring! This is the difficult stuff: figuring the little guy out, figuring out his "schedule," figuring out if he needs a schedule or if it's ok that he doesn't eat every three hours.. if it's a good thing that he can be flexible. Figuring out why he's crying, what he needs and what's best for him. I know this journey has only started, but I so badly want to be the best Mom I can be to him. I want to train him and teach him so that he grows up feeling loved, loving God and just loving this life we give him!
Then there's times when it feels so good to just let go of all that. To not think, to not worry, to not try to do it all right.. and just be with him. To cuddle and squeeze him and let him bounce on my lap squealing at 9 at night. I love love being a Mom and I wouldn't change a thing. I am so grateful for where the Lord has brought me and the life that Luke and I have lived so far. Staring at that little guy, I know that this is where God wants me! I know that I'm meant to be a mom to him! It sounds simple, but when Leyton lights up and smiles the biggest smile he's got when he looks at me, or giggles so hard when Luke wants in the room (oh, priceless).. it just confirms that we're doing this all right! There isn't an equation or a formula for this baby. All we can do is love him everyday and that's pretty much it. That's all he needs.
This new life of ours is definitely hard, sometimes frustrating.. but always always so rewarding. I love our little man and wouldn't change a thing.
There. How's that for emotional. Now onto some cute pictures :)
You are wonderful. That made me cry!
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